Promiscuity is a part of human nature. There is a saying, "women need a reason to have sex, men just need a place". The desires and needs behind the sexual act may differ between sexes, but the physical need is the underlying, motivating force. Mental, egotistical, emotional, social or other concerns are peripheral to the physicality of the need. Pressures in military life may seem an adequate excuse, but as I said, sex is natural. There are immense pressures fighting the peace as well. To me, if someone gets drunk, acts a fool and does/says something they regret later, then applies the excuse "I was drunk", well that just doesn't cut it to me. Perhaps you should have laid off the booze. The same applies to marital infidelity in my books. You took the steps, said the vows, declared your undying love for the other person, then a little time and distance separates you and suddenly that all goes out the window? This is the sign of a weak intellect, an poorly defined psyche. Clearly the person was talking out of the side of their mouth when they were blathering about eternal love and need to lay off the daytime soap operas and develop their own identity. All of the systems we apply(mostly to others whenever we can), including the marriage institution, for that is what it is, an institution, are all completely un-natural. Antithesis to the human condition, anathema. Personally, I do not believe we are the most evolved species on this planet, we are simply the apex predator, the most complicated animal. We can't seem to complicate or lives enough because it becomes a bigger mess daily. Considering that humans are at odds with everything natural around them, especially themselves and others(we do not adapt to our surroundings, we adapt our surroundings to suit us, hence, still evolving, not "evolved", whereas a lion or tiger or bird or elephant integrates into the existing environment - perhaps the "dumb animals" are actually of a higher evolved state than we are), it should be no surprise to anyone that when the monkey is taken out of the cage, it's desires flood to the surface and off it goes, running wild. If your spouse has been philandering, get a lawyer and get a divorce, it is that simple. In Roman times, when a man's wife was cheating, he was well within his rights to kill her and the man she was cheating with as well, she being his "property". Clearly, we do not need to return to a Roman stance of conducting ourselves, (although some in society greatly desire exactly that) for the Romans were at least as brutal as they were civilized. Affirm YOURSELF, you do not need another person, a significant other to affirm who you are, nor any parent, friend, organization or comittee of thousands. You affirm yourself, then go out and find someone whom has also self-affirmed and then you compliment each other.